a feminist

a conversation at night after too much unnecessary things riding your head could be the one that saves your day the most.

I had a conversation about happiness last night.

We, my friend and I, are the kind of woman who think happiness is couldn't be determined by what other people opinion, or we can say "normal" standard. Marriage, having kids, houses, cars, and so on and so on. The list will keep going.

Why in our life, there's a satanic circle, oh forgive what I said, that questioning your life. First comes with, when will you going to finish your college?, where is your boy/girlfriend?. Oh and it's getting worse, I promise you. When are you going to married? Why I haven't see you two having kids, it's not good to postponed it. When she/he will got a little sister/brother? and so on and so on. For God sake, it's your life, not theirs.

Oh God....

I cringe. for sure. I can't take it.

Why asian people super attract to something like that. It's their personal business for God sake. Why they couldn't leave it a moment.

Okay,  maybe I'm too much complaining.

but, can you get my point?

You absolutely can call me naive. But, at the end my goals is just to be happy. A simple yet very complicated thing to do.

Happiness rely on your mind, on your heart.  F*ck the people who said you need to get married to be happy, or having children. The idea about you having another part of your soul out there in someone else's body terrifying me most of the time.

Let me get this right. I'm not against marriage or having kids. I want someone to rely on too. I just can't stand the people who thinks it's everything.

Somebody has told me this, more or less,

in a relationship, let us take is as perfect as 100, why people always feeling, they just need to fill their life at 50 points, so the "one" can fill the other 50. Together they think they can make a complete relationship. So when you lost your other 50, you start to feel empty. No. It shouldn't be like that. You need to fill your life up to 100, then find or meet the other who has filled their life up to 100 too. Together you build a complete relationship. So when you lose the other half, you didn't lose yourself.

and the other person said this,

a guy prefer a clingy girlfriend rather than the independent one. Why? Because we feel more superior and there's an ego on ourselves, the need to be needed. What's the fun when your girlfriend can do everything by herself?

Oh God.... Why the guy who told me something like that didn't understand the earlier girl said about relationship. We, girls and women, need a man, not to be our cash bank, a driver nor porter who carry our shopping bag around the mall. We need a psychological support. We need someone to share our feeling in happy or sad. Why they didn't get it right?

and there's a shocking one.

Many women told their child, if you are a boy, you need to be smart. but if you are a girl, you just need to be pretty.

...just need to be pretty.

can I cry right now?

Kartini ages ago fight for woman rights to be equal with the man, to be able to receive the same education, to get the same position, to be able to have an opinion. Why on the earth now, the women she fighting for, throw everything she had fight for and want to be back to the dark time?

I went to cinema days ago watched The Intern. It's about a successful woman, names Julie Ostin, played by the oh-my-god-so-pretty-Anne-Hathaway, had a senior citizen who became her intern, played by the-adorable-gramps-Robert-de-Niro. There's a scene that I perfectly remember about that film, when Jules get some critics from the other moms from her child's school, because she's so busy and her husband becomes house-dad. She said, why on the earth there's still people who critic much about working mom?

That's exactly got the point.